This movie is like a cray person’s brain. Some good, some bad, and a lot of fucking nonsense.
I’ll start with the good because thats easy.
Harley - Holy shit. She was amazing with the exception of one part. The scene in the club with Joker when he’s going to give her to some jack ass. Clearly this was a way to make a bunch of 13 year old boys get a boner. She was way over sexuallized. Her sexiness comes from her coyness, her craziness, and her own style of cuteness. It doesn’t come from being a whore. Other then that I thought she was outstanding.
Deadshot - Will Smith was really good and thank god for the chemistry between himself, Rick Flag, and Harley. Because other than that it was pretty lifeless. This is due to him just being him. Very likable, funny, and charismatic.
Rick Flag - I like the dude. What can I say.
Enchantress the Witch - I like this incarnation of her a lot. I liked the end battle against her as well. Thought it looked cool and it should have been the only end fight.
Katana - Didn’t say a lot but she looked cool. LOL
The Batman scenes were cool and some of the action set pieces were good.
The Joker - Fuck him. Why was he even in the movie? The subplot with he and Harley was so pointless. The only good parts of him were two 2 second clips where he’s in the tux dancing with Harley in her original suit and one where he’s firing a gold AK-47 from the back of a helicopter and the ending scene that was about 1min. Other then that. F.U.C.K. HIM. You would think that because of the way people complained about Jared Leto being in character all the time and doing gross things that he’d have a better role in the movie. But no. He’s pointless. I didn’t even mind his look or mannerisms. He was just pointless.
Slipknot - Holy shit. Speaking of pointless. He literally showed up out of no where and then his head got blown off 2mins later. I seriously laughed out loud when that happened. Like it was awkward.
El Diablo - Meeeeeeeeeeeh. His big reveal was some Fantastic Four level CGI shit. OMG. That was laughable.
Some Big The Mummy Returns Jabroni Who Is Enchantress’s Brother? - Speaking of F4 CGI. This thing was just horrible. Speaking of pointless. Good god. I’m done wasting key strokes on this asshole
Boomerang - No idea what he said. Ever.
Killer Croc - It was as if Dave Chappelle made a sketch about a black super villain and made him overly stereotyped and gave it to David Ayer as a joke and David Ayer fucking ran with it. His one wish for joining the team was to have BET Television in his cell. Even Michael Bay was shaking his head.
The Music. My god. The fucking music. What sucks is I thought the songs they chose went really well but they throw them at you rapid fire as in 3 in a row with no break in between and then 2 more about 10 mins later. Then pretty much nothing after that. You see, it works in Guardians because they are spread out and add some levity to a situation and because music is a huge part of who Peter Quill is. Not here though.
There was a bunch of weird shit that happened.
[spoiler]There was a part with Boomerang that could have been perfect. They are at a point where they can pretty much bail. Before the word “leave” is spoken he just runs. It was actually really funny. But then the fuck face comes back 20 seconds later for no reason other then to appear in a slow motion shot of them all walking down the street. It would have been classic if we never saw him again or if maybe he came back in some big heroic way. Nope.
Also, the helicopter they are in gets shot down and flips over like 30 times. It was like something out of The Other Guys. Thats how comical it was. But they just get out like no biggie. WTF.
They have to go extract a HVT from a high rise that is smack dab in the center of all the supernatural shit going down. It turns out to be Waller. Why she even needs to be in the city where the battle is going on instead of a bunker in DC is beyond me. Then her Helicopter gets shot down 10 seconds after they rescue her. Plus, how did she get there? Why was she there? She could run that shit show remotely. They never said why she was there. Or maybe they did and I was bored and wasn’t listening.
What is with DC and making machines that destroy things? At one point Enchantress says “I’m going to make a machine”. No other details are given. Then she actually builds a machine out of actual thin air that looks just like the thing Zod used in Man of Steel. Hey fuck-os. She doesn’t need a machine. She can already build an army of undead and, as she showed earlier, break into any place in 2 secs. She actually teleports herself into a terrorists vault overseas and steals some type of plans and drops them on some generals lap. The whole process took mere seconds. Her stealing nuke codes for the highest bidder should have been the threat. Not Zod Machine 2.0
Pretty but Evil Enchantress was lame and the CGI made her look like plastic.
The Mummy Returns dude had to have been based on an old video game. I swear I’ve see this before. The guys arms can turn into whips and stretch really long. If you’ve seen the movie maybe you’ll know what game I’m talking about. But it was all I could think of.
EDIT: HELL YES! Prototype 2 is what I was thinking of.